To be continued...

As I stated in my email I will not be able to finish the physical work until I return at the end of the month. I also plan on continuing into next semester because then I will have all of the materials to make the Sweet Tooth books and other items. As of right now I can give you a general break down of time spent on independent art projects (meaning they were worked on outside of any other class and what I consider to be independent study/work).

I can say in all honesty I spent more than 120 hours this semester on the following projects; Stephanie and Sophia, Sweet Tooth, Man-Made, general photography and the web site. That includes traveling, researching, documenting as well as the time I spent uploading, sorting, adjusting, printing and re-printing images.
I also spent some time in the darkroom learning how to use Fiber Paper instead of RC, but was limited because one of the lights was out and it was hard to time the chemicals (Jeanette has now fixed it).
I spent an insane amount of time researching and producing work this semester. I made it a point to come in every weekend from 12 - 7pm so I could work without interruption. You can ask any student who knows me and they will say I live at WSUV and am insanely over-dedicated. I really just don't want to waste a moment or opportunity to produce work. If I really added up the hours spent working on my artwork at WSUV this semester it would equal having no outside life. Depressing, but that's the way I prefer it.

In closing, I really want to continue doing a 499 next semester. I will be ready to finish the Sweet Tooth series when I return with my dad's paperwork. I also want to continue to build my resume and add to the website and my portfolio. I am sure I will be juggling 3 more projects to complete as well and will be living in the WSUV studio again. I hope by now you know I do not take any of this lightly and really want to get better and am willing to do the work to get there. Maybe I will even slow down and work on grant writing (my next goal) and submitting proposals to galleries.

Thanks again for everything Harrison...

Different Than My Usual Subject Matter...

These are not my usual subject matter. A couple of silly things I happened across and some that are more about texture, color and things I might use in a photomontage down the road.

Returning to my friend Joanne's house we found this lovely surprise. What else is there for a kitten to do while their owner is away?

I was walking to Starbucks when I came across this. The wind had just blown it down and it was kind of surreal. The man in the orange shirt was more concerned about the fact that it landed next to his car, while I thought the way it broke was very odd.

I was walking by my neighbor's window and saw this dead moth. I thought it was interesting against the wood and water stains.

This is one of my favorite rose bushes. It is supposed to be lavender and red, but as it fades it gets a watercolor look to it.

My dog's kiddie pool. I left it out long after summer was over and this is what I found when I finally got around to cleaning it out. I really like the texture and color.

This is my bird bath in the front of my house. Once again the signs of fall and neglect left interesting colors and textures.

I actually shot a series of these while thinking about photomontage. I was waiting at Les Schwab and wandered around outside. Lots of metal objects, water, rust, etc. Interesting textures and colors again. I actually like this one as is. Probably the softness of it.

More New Images

These are more of the new images I have been working on.

Kittens for sale under a sign about adopting cats from the Humane Society. The kids are in costume because it was Halloween.

Gunther and his aging face. I think the texture is amazing.

Dieter hanging out with the fallen apples in my yard. I actually don't photograph my dogs enough and I thought this fit his personality.

The remodel at the Shilo Inn in Vancouver. I thought it was a perfect example of waste and American consumerism. We demand new and throw out the old.

This squirrel looks like any other squirrel, but I came across him after he had been hit by a car. He was in the street, looking stunned and I stopped and chased him onto the sidewalk so that he might have a shot at surviving. He sat looking at me with blood around his mouth and I debated about what to do. In the end I knew he probably would not make it, but I want to believe he recovered and I saved him from being flattened by a car. Tough situation for an animal person.

I was leaving my friend's apartment and saw these kids. They're different than my normal subject matter, but there was something about how excited they were.

Portrait of Elvis from Saturday Market.

Cleaning tables at a cafe. Kind of felt like a Robert Frank moment.

I really was drawn to the color and pattern in this shot. The red neon gave the scene a deeper feel.

More of the New Sweet Tooth Photos

These have to do with me being back in my parent's environment and the changes within that environment; raised toilet chair in the bathroom, new bed, etc.

My dad's bathroom.

Mom's dressing area.

Me reflected in my dads' bathroom mirror.

Me in my parent's old bed.

New Photos for "Sweet Tooth"

I have a new set of photos I am considering for the Sweet Tooth series. I am not sure if they will fit into the books I will be making after the first of the year, or if a few of them should stand on their own. I feel the ones of my dad in dialysis are particularly painful to look at. It is unfortunate that young people who are being diagnosed with diabetes cannot see the future in store for them if they do not take care of themselves. I have my dad as an example and he actually did take care of himself over the past 30 years while having diabetes. His condition makes me want to avoid the same fate and if it can help to show others why they should take diabetes seriously I will feel like I have accomplished something. I also should add that my mother is more open to what I have been working on, while my father is not. I am sure he is embarrassed considering his condition after being a big, strong father figure for most of my life.

Dad at Dialysis.

My Parent's Home. These have to do with medical care, appointments, prescriptions and blood sugar monitoring.

Talking with my mom about my dad's condition.

Self-Portraits

These portraits were taken with the intention of being included in a series I started about man-made products and nature. I completed the first piece for a recycled art show at the White Sturgeon Gallery in Vancouver for November & December. I am not sure how these will be incorporated in the series yet.

The first piece completed.

A tribute to the photo montage I did in your class.

The rest of the portraits. I am especially pleased with the last two.

Re-visiting the Trojan Nuclear Site

I recently re-visited the Trojan site and found that they had knocked down the dome, which had been there when I photographed it in June of 2008. It was the starting point for The Hanford Project which I worked on in Art & Ecology class. My friend Kyle went with me and these are three of my favorite shots from that day.

1. The gate where I photographed the dome from.

2. Kyle sitting on the train tracks. The dome would've been in the background.

3. We walked around the park next to Trojan and I thought the swampy green water was beautiful.

Changing The Goal For This Semester

After the talk we had about my project and the realization that I could not #1 - prove how much time was being spent on research and #2 - finish the project until I had all of the materials from my mother, I have decided to add to my goals for this semester.

I have already taken, logged and reviewed approximately 1063 digital images this semester for other projects, not including the hundreds I have taken for FA 385 assignments. I can actually break down the dates and the amounts uploaded from my camera as I keep everything in dated, titled folders. At this point I will continue to work on the Sweet Tooth Project this semester, but in addition I will complete work you can see in order to prove I have done over 120 hours. Honestly I have already exceeded that between gathering and revising images in order to build my artist website and the on-going projects I work on everyday outside of school.

I am continuing the journey I started last semester with the encouragement of Rhoda, in order to start adding gallery shows to my resume and building a network for myself. Until 6-8 months ago I had never submitted my work, let alone never been juried into a show. Since the Art & Ecology show at Northbank in July I have now completed the Stephanie & Sophia installation and also been juried into a recycled arts show at White Sturgeon Gallery. I have now been asked to become a member at Northbank where I have found a support system of other female artists.

In order to keep building momentum I have decided to build my own website. I have artwork dating back to 1985. Of course I will most likely only include the work that fits into my most recent series and perhaps some of my street artwork since it is what Juxtapoz magazine featured last year. Over the last few weeks I have gone through hundreds of digital and analog images in order to start getting organized for the website. I hope to start the actual building next week.

In addition, I have gone through all 1063 digital images I have taken this semester (outside of class projects) so that I might present some samples for you here. Some fit into projects I am already working on and some were just things I found interesting.

These are from my trip to Seattle where we visited the sculpture park. I really loved walking around the city and taking photos.

1. Reflection Mural

2. Construction

3. Red Lady

Progress Report

It has been too long between posts, but I have been doing a lot of research through my family and doctors. It also is hard when doing research to obviously show proof of what you are working on, since there is no finished product.
My father has had yet another surgery due to a doctor's mistake and now half of one of his fingers has been amputated in addition to his big toe, which was also due to a doctor's mistake. Really doesn't give me the confidence to trust doctors at the moment.
Despite everything he remains an ideal patient, who never complains and always tries to look on the bright side. I recorded a 4 minute phone conversation I had with him and decided to turn it into a sound experiment. Being in Seth's class has definitely shown me some of the things you can do with sound and I think people being able to hear my dad and the subject matter of our phone conversation is important to the work I am doing.
I have a rough mix, which I plan on integrating into this installation, although I am not sure where I will introduce it.
I realize that my dad has made an effort to speak with me more often (he used to let my mother do all of the talking), but it is difficult when he is not able to talk for more than a few minutes at a time and most things in my life seem so trivial in comparison to what he is going through. I instead get sound bites and just a few moments of strained conversation before he has to get off of the phone.
I would like to upload the sound file, but do not know how to do that with a wav file.

Gathering images...

I have been gathering images I want to use to create the silkscreened pieces. I have found a photo of my dad as a baby and one of he and I together when I was young. I do not have a lot of photos of him in my possession, but I also am going through my storage boxes in an effort to find the ones I do have.

I do know I want to include the two I mentioned as well as one I took of him working the bbq many years ago. It's very representative of his personality, holding a large steak up with a fork while smiling at me.

I am including in this post the photo taken of my collection of sugar packets, which I keep adding to...

Sugar Packets

I started collecting different types of sugar packets this summer with the intention of incorporating them as a back drop for the silkscreen printing I am planning. Every time I am at a coffee shop, restaurant, etc and I see different brands/packaging for sugar I collect as many as I am able. 

I have started this week planning the size and shape of the work, according to the size and amount of each type of packet I have. I am going to get these all mapped out and then I will be able to start working with the size of images that will be attached over the sugar packets. I plan on using 2 layers of plexi-glass stacked with spacers between. The silkscreened image will be on top and the packets beneath. I am wanting the packets to be subtle and partially hidden and I decided this was the best way to achieve that goal. 

Moving Along

I am moving forward with planning and research for the next phase of this project.

I decided to start with a phone call to my mother to ask her to save all of my dad's prescription bottles, doctor appointment cards and their yearly calendar where she keeps track of all of his appointments. 

She informed me that she has many years of saved calendars and you can see the increase in appointments, surgeries, etc. through this year, which has been overwhelming for them. I felt this was important to my series as it represents the future health of a diabetic which can include heart disease, kidney failure, loss of eyesight and amputation among other issues.

My father took pretty good care of himself, so looking at his case is an eye opener. It shows a bleak future for someone in my situation and it makes me want to be pro-active.

The materials I gather from my mom at the end of this year will be made into a book by me. I feel it will add to the realism of my subject matter and educate the viewer at the same time.

At this time I am working on the plans for a full installation including photographs, silk-screened images incorporating sugar and insulin, the book of my father's documentation, my pill bottles and his, possibly displayed on small shelves or as a sculpture and the construction of a sugar cube and insulin screen on which I will project home movies and images of my father and I. 

I am planning on completing the silk-screened images as well as more photography during this semester and will start work on the book and finalize and prepare images/home movies to be projected next semester. I will draw out the plans for the sugar screen, but will only construct it on site at a gallery if and when it is shown to the public.

No one wants a huge ant-magnet to be stored in their house. :)

My Goals

I have decided to work toward completing "Sweet Tooth" during my Fall 08 independent study. It is an exploration of the relationship between myself, my father and diabetes.

I plan to add more silver gelatin photographs, as well as silk-screened prints which incorporate sugar and insulin as part of the inking process. Some of the techniques I will use were the suggestion of Yoshi during a discussion he and I had about my desired outcome with these pieces.

In order to create this work, I will need to use the studio room and silk-screening supplies in addition to the darkroom. I will send a separate email with a cc to Jeanette in order to make sure we are all on the same page.

During this time I will continue to work on organizing my portfolio and submitting work to various galleries and venues in an effort to build on the shows I have and will be participating in for 2008.

Purpose of this project

In April of 2007 I became very ill. After a week of not being able to eat, a constant temperature and the inability to do more than lay on the sofa I decided to go to Urgent Care. 

The reason I delayed that decision is because I do not have insurance and could not afford what was sure to be a large doctor bill. They informed me I had pneumonia and sent me home with antibiotics and strict orders to drink lots of Gatorade to re-hydrate myself. After 2-3 days my condition worsened and a friend drove me to the hospital. I knew at that point something was seriously wrong and it was then I learned I had bacterial pneumonia, my body had stopped producing insulin from the stress and the sugar in the Gatorade had sent me over the edge. They also informed me my blood oxygen was dangerously low and I was running a 105 degree temperature.

After 4 days in the hospital they saved my life, but I was told I could not leave unless I learned how to inject insulin. I did and after a week at home on regular food my doctor put me on oral medication for diabetes. 

Regardless of how it happened or if I would've been diagnosed eventually down the road, I had to process all of the various emotions attached with what had happened and how my life would now be different. 

In addition to all of the emotions attached to my situation, I have been dealing with my father's health deteriorating as he has been a diabetic for approximately 30 years. He has had heart problems, vision problems and now is in kidney failure and has had to have a toe and finger amputated. He is at a point where he is maintaining, but not fully recovering. I now have to be there for my mom and help her emotionally deal with everything, be a cheerleader for my dad and process my own emotions about the situation as well. 

I decided a year after my incident to start working through my feelings with a series of medium format gelatin prints in the darkroom class during summer session 2008 with Alexis Pike. I am posting those images here as they are the beginning of what I have started. They are self-portraits reflecting the emotional phases I have gone through in dealing with what happened to me.

First 6 images in the series