Sugar Packets

I started collecting different types of sugar packets this summer with the intention of incorporating them as a back drop for the silkscreen printing I am planning. Every time I am at a coffee shop, restaurant, etc and I see different brands/packaging for sugar I collect as many as I am able. 

I have started this week planning the size and shape of the work, according to the size and amount of each type of packet I have. I am going to get these all mapped out and then I will be able to start working with the size of images that will be attached over the sugar packets. I plan on using 2 layers of plexi-glass stacked with spacers between. The silkscreened image will be on top and the packets beneath. I am wanting the packets to be subtle and partially hidden and I decided this was the best way to achieve that goal. 

Moving Along

I am moving forward with planning and research for the next phase of this project.

I decided to start with a phone call to my mother to ask her to save all of my dad's prescription bottles, doctor appointment cards and their yearly calendar where she keeps track of all of his appointments. 

She informed me that she has many years of saved calendars and you can see the increase in appointments, surgeries, etc. through this year, which has been overwhelming for them. I felt this was important to my series as it represents the future health of a diabetic which can include heart disease, kidney failure, loss of eyesight and amputation among other issues.

My father took pretty good care of himself, so looking at his case is an eye opener. It shows a bleak future for someone in my situation and it makes me want to be pro-active.

The materials I gather from my mom at the end of this year will be made into a book by me. I feel it will add to the realism of my subject matter and educate the viewer at the same time.

At this time I am working on the plans for a full installation including photographs, silk-screened images incorporating sugar and insulin, the book of my father's documentation, my pill bottles and his, possibly displayed on small shelves or as a sculpture and the construction of a sugar cube and insulin screen on which I will project home movies and images of my father and I. 

I am planning on completing the silk-screened images as well as more photography during this semester and will start work on the book and finalize and prepare images/home movies to be projected next semester. I will draw out the plans for the sugar screen, but will only construct it on site at a gallery if and when it is shown to the public.

No one wants a huge ant-magnet to be stored in their house. :)

My Goals

I have decided to work toward completing "Sweet Tooth" during my Fall 08 independent study. It is an exploration of the relationship between myself, my father and diabetes.

I plan to add more silver gelatin photographs, as well as silk-screened prints which incorporate sugar and insulin as part of the inking process. Some of the techniques I will use were the suggestion of Yoshi during a discussion he and I had about my desired outcome with these pieces.

In order to create this work, I will need to use the studio room and silk-screening supplies in addition to the darkroom. I will send a separate email with a cc to Jeanette in order to make sure we are all on the same page.

During this time I will continue to work on organizing my portfolio and submitting work to various galleries and venues in an effort to build on the shows I have and will be participating in for 2008.

Purpose of this project

In April of 2007 I became very ill. After a week of not being able to eat, a constant temperature and the inability to do more than lay on the sofa I decided to go to Urgent Care. 

The reason I delayed that decision is because I do not have insurance and could not afford what was sure to be a large doctor bill. They informed me I had pneumonia and sent me home with antibiotics and strict orders to drink lots of Gatorade to re-hydrate myself. After 2-3 days my condition worsened and a friend drove me to the hospital. I knew at that point something was seriously wrong and it was then I learned I had bacterial pneumonia, my body had stopped producing insulin from the stress and the sugar in the Gatorade had sent me over the edge. They also informed me my blood oxygen was dangerously low and I was running a 105 degree temperature.

After 4 days in the hospital they saved my life, but I was told I could not leave unless I learned how to inject insulin. I did and after a week at home on regular food my doctor put me on oral medication for diabetes. 

Regardless of how it happened or if I would've been diagnosed eventually down the road, I had to process all of the various emotions attached with what had happened and how my life would now be different. 

In addition to all of the emotions attached to my situation, I have been dealing with my father's health deteriorating as he has been a diabetic for approximately 30 years. He has had heart problems, vision problems and now is in kidney failure and has had to have a toe and finger amputated. He is at a point where he is maintaining, but not fully recovering. I now have to be there for my mom and help her emotionally deal with everything, be a cheerleader for my dad and process my own emotions about the situation as well. 

I decided a year after my incident to start working through my feelings with a series of medium format gelatin prints in the darkroom class during summer session 2008 with Alexis Pike. I am posting those images here as they are the beginning of what I have started. They are self-portraits reflecting the emotional phases I have gone through in dealing with what happened to me.

First 6 images in the series